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Writing Improvement Tutorials
Courtesy of Rick Bailey, A.D.
English Instructor

This exercise should be done after you have completed the material on the comma.  In particular, comma exercise 2 explores the punctuation of pairs, series, and coordination.  If you have done that exercise, continue reading.  If not, you are advised to go to that exercise. 

Parallelism is the grammatical similarity of parts joined in a pair or series.  “I went to school, bought my books, and chatted with my counselor for a few minutes.”  In this sentence, there is a series of verbs in the past tense: went, bought, and chatted.  Because of their similarity, this series is said to be parallel.  Now let’s look at an example that is not parallel:    

  • In my childhood years, I'd tend to forget homework or doing a chore. 

You get the writer’s drift here.  He’s talking about two oversights or problems.  So there’s a pair involved.  But in a grammatical sense, it’s not clear what is being paired.  What does the writer join with the conjunction “or”?  “Homework” and “doing,” a noun and a participle.  These are not like parts of speech.  The sentence is simplified and made parallel with a few revisions: 

    In my childhood years, I'd tend to forget homework or doing a chore. 
    In my childhood years, I'd tend to forget homework or a chores. 
    In my childhood years, I'd tend to forget homework or chores.

The pair is now parallel because it consists of two similar grammatical units.  The sentence sounds better.  It is also much more concise.  Here’s another example:  

  • So if I were to own a small business and looking to hire you into my field of work, you must be knowledgeable, dependent, friendly, and dress within store code.

Look for conjunctions and examine what the writer joins with those conjunctions.  In this case, there is both a pair and a series. 

    So if I were to own a small business and looking to hire you into my field of work 

    and

    you must be knowledgeable, dependent, friendly, and dress within store code.

Alter the phrasing to make similar grammatical parts.  When you do so, keep this rule of thumb in mind: simple is best.   

    So if I were to owned a small business and wanted looking to hire you into my field of work 

    you must would have to be knowledgeable, dependent, friendly, and dressed within store code

So if I owned a small business and wanted to hire you into my field of work, you would have to be knowledgeable, dependent, friendly, and dressed in keeping with the store code. 

Directions: Highlight conjunctions in each sentence below.  Then determine and underline what terms are being joined in the pair or series.  Revise the sentences so that pairs and series are grammatically parallel.  Some cutting may be necessary.  Try to preserve the exact meaning of the sentence. Complete the work and return to this site for the answers.

Question One:

You always have to find someone you can trust, rely on, and be very good with customers.

Question Two:

They should feel comfortable working with others and not someone who tries to do all the work by themselves. 

Question Three:

I learned many things working in the restaurant.  I learned to make pizza, cook, and cashier.

Question Four:

First the problem had to be defined, then a meeting of the minds, and lastly, organizing committees around the world under the watchful eyes of the UN.

Question Five:

One leader was dubbed by his own people to be incompetent and a disaster as Secretary of the Environment. 

Question Six:

I was stuck swimming in the hotel pool and ocean by myself.  That was about all there was to do besides miniature golf or going for a boat ride. 

Question Seven:

I tried to outsmart him by speeding up or turn quickly so I could confuse him.

Question Eight:

We'd play cops and robbers until one of us got called in for dinner, for the night, or if we got tired. 

Question Nine:

I will always remember the scene in the Bone Collector where a gun ripped off a mans fingers, toes, and shot through his heart.  

Question Ten:

Without guns there would be less war, senseless death, and more peace.

Question Eleven:

I wanted to make the right choice in size, price, and good running car for me.

Question Twelve:

Charity is never done as a chore, or doing something because you have to.

 

Back to Sentence Works Exercise page


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